Coping with Anger in A Sales Transaction

Does Anger Affect Your Attitude?

Anger is expressed in many ways. I wish I could tell you when it is formed and the exact cause of it but I  can’t. It seems that anger is stirred by the minutest things these days. Is it possible that modern TV programs and movies promote anger to be expressed rather than kindness and humility? I know from experience that the older I get, the less patience I have and the quicker I am to state my feelings of frustration. Sometimes my expressions are less than desirable, because I speak before I think. Everything we say and do has consequences but at the time, the consequences weren’t important. I consider this type anger to be trivial. It’s not like I pulled a gun and shot somebody between the eyes. However, being a sales person, the result may be just as consequential to my financial well being. Showing dissatisfaction with a sharp tongue may cause a person to not want to do business with me.

Think how often anger interrupts your personality. You’re driving down the road and someone pulls out in front of you and causes you to spill your coffee. You stop by WalMart to pick up one item; you go through the express lane only to find the cashier has to do a price check for the person ahead of you. Then you’re walking to your car, and step on gum that some thoughtless person left on the parking lot. You’re running late to your next appointment because a lady in front of you is not paying attention to her driving because she is trying to drive, smoke a cigarette, talk on the phone, and put her makeup on all at the same time. Then when you arrive at your appointment, they are unhappy because you’re a few minutes late. Seemingly the smallest things can trigger anger that can affect our personality the rest of the day.

Most of the time these little frustrations are replaced by a positive action because you really weren’t angry; you were just frustrated with careless actions from others. Some people have very serious anger problems of which they can’t control. Some so serious they have to get medical help but this is not the type anger I’m talking about today.

The Mental Health Foundation of London, England published a report entitled, “Boiling Point—Problem Anger and What We Can Do About It.” In this report statistics showed that 84% of the work force feels more stressed at work than they did five years ago. It illustrated that 65% of office workers have experienced office rage. In an office setting, 45% of the staff regularly loses their temper at work. Up to 60% of all absences from work are caused by stress. According to the report 33% of Britons are not on speaking terms with their neighbors. Additionally, 64% either agree or strongly agree that people in general are getting angrier; while 32% say they have a close friend or family member who has trouble controlling their anger.

I think it’s safe to say that we have more anger problems today than in years past. Regardless of the cause, we are responsibility to control our own actions. People can cause us grief but only I, can control my personal attitude. It has been determined that negative stimuli (thoughts) sent to our brain, regardless of the reason, can only be replaced by positive stimuli. This is the reason professional sales people are religious about saying affirmations many, many times every day. They understand they must continually feed their mind with positive thoughts to keep negativism from controlling their actions.

Many of us experience stress for various reasons. With the cost of living continually rising, depressed economic conditions, coupled with the fact that people have less money to spend, there’s no wonder we experience some degree of stress. The best way to counteract stress is to meditate on the many blessings we have. The real estate market has been defunct for several years now but where else could I work that offers the same income potential, not to mention the gratification that comes from helping other people. I truly feel like I work in the best industry in the world. All sales people need to have this same feeling about the industry within which they work or they’ll never reach success.

Anyone that has been in sales very long has heard the saying, “All Buyer’s Are Liars.” This is a true statement. They don’t consider it lying. They consider it sparing your feelings, or keeping their feeling close to the vest. They don’t totally trust you at this point so they withhold information to keep you from using their information to make a sale. Nobody likes to be lied to, and when it happens, it stirs our anger. As temporary as it may be, it makes us mad. Instead of spouting off to our clients about their lies, or confronting them about it, we should ask ourselves, what could I have said or done to win their trust and respect so they would have told me the truth. You see, when you point a finger at someone else, there are three fingers pointing back at yourself.  We are both the cause of the lie.

A prerequisite for a successful sales person is the enjoyment of serving others, total honesty, character, trustworthiness, and the ability to communicate with others. If we continually fill our minds with positive thoughts, negative thoughts won’t be able to get in. Notice I said “fill” our minds. Do this little experiment;   fill a jug with water and then fill a glass with the water. Did you fill the glass completely? Now pour a little more water into the glass. Could you get more water into the glass? If you could, you didn’t fill the glass like you were instructed. When you fill a container with a substance, it won’t hold any more. It’s full. Everything else is an overflow. Thus, our minds should be full of positive thoughts at all times so as not to allow any negative thoughts to enter.

Be thankful for what you have. Don’t be covetous of what others have. Practice humility in all that you do. Always put your client’s best interests ahead of your own personal interest, and you will enjoy much success with far fewer frustrations.

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